Status update.

I’ve started texting friends things like, “What’s the level of stir crazy today?” as a strange way of checking in, but also, maybe, because it’s a question I’ve been asking myself all the time.

It’s my spring break over here, which somehow, feels harder than being quarantined while having work to take my mind off things. I’m trying to take this week mostly off, like for real not working, not responding to emails, or anything, because the transition to distance teaching was brutal and exhausting and frustrating. I need to gather up my strength to face it again, especially because the thought of having to do it for the rest of this school year…. well just insert that sobbing emoji over my face, and you’ll have an accurate picture of how I feel about it.

Last week, I had some of the milder symptoms of Covid-19. The shortness of breath, a low fever, sore throat, headaches, fatigue, yada yada. At one point, my breathing got so bad that the advice nurse on the phone sent me into the ER, just so they could check in on me. The good news is that the results of the chest scan and blood tests and whatever else they did all showed that I’m relatively young & healthy. So, that’s good.

The bad news is that, for better or worse, their tests eliminated any possible cause for my symptoms other than a “viral respiratory illness” that sure looks a lot like that one that’s been all over the news. Since I’m relatively low-risk and under 60, and California is so short on tests, they couldn’t give me a Covid-19 test there in the hospital. But they told me to assume I had it & stay inside my house until after the fever had been completely gone for 4 days.

For now, I feel lucky to have had a milder case of whatever virus I had, lucky to be young and relatively healthy otherwise, lucky to have a nice home with lots of natural light and a partner who does such a wonderful job taking care of me, and lucky lucky lucky, all around.

That being said, now that I’m feeling a bit better, my stir crazy levels are at an all time high and I’m realizing how much regular exercise was helping me cope and manage my anxiety around all this. Without that, plus with being on spring break and not having work to keep me busy, things have felt a little sad and lonely lately.

So, that’s my status: A little stir crazy, a little lonely, but definitely lucky. And tomorrow marks five days since my fever went away, so I’m really really glad I’ll be able to go for a walk outside.